1) GOD WANTS YOU TO PREPARE. BEST REASON, right? God wants you to prepare for Alien Laser Wombats, for the righteous shall survive. Of course, the existence of Alien Laser Wombats would seriously call some of the good book into question. As would zombies. Those things would be rather contradictory of the bible, so I guess that preparing for the apocalypse for those reasons might be considered an act of blasphemy. However, if it's a rapture-esque God-caused apocalypse, then that's a perfectly valid(by 'valid' I mean 'biblical') reason for the apocalypse, so preparation would be okay. Er, but, if you're already going to church on Sunday, you're probably as prepared as you're going to get. Okay, this reason sucks. Let's start over at #1.
1) WE MUST SURVIVE. The continued survival of the human race. It is imperative that our species survive! Humans are 100% responsible for all things awesome: the creation of toasters, bubble gum, Nicki Minaj, toenail clippers, and videos extolling the awesomeness of double rainbows. Did salamanders create any of these things? NO! Did flamingos? Heck no! Humans are clearly superior. The race that brought you McDonald's, genital mutilation, genocide, poaching into extinction, and the atom bomb should definitely be - Mkay those are kinda bad examples. This is very frustrating. The next reason will be better.
At least we got to #2, with "we must survive" coming through as the clear winner, though relatively weak-ass.
Next post: I'll examine four other reasons to prepare for the apocalypse:
2) GMO corn
4) Ted Nugent
Until then - with love and SoCo - TM